stairbags

sign.jpgStaircases are dangerous places. Especially for small people. That’s why the world needs stairbags.

Used instead of ugly child stair gates – stairbags are small, elegant, beautifully designed pouches that you install at various points on your staircases. If they sense a child falling they expand, filling the space with fluffy clouds of synthetic inflated balloon joy for the clumsy child to relax in until they wait for adult assistance to arrive.

Advantages: You don’t need to open them every time you pass. You don’t need to remember to close them every five minutes. You don’t need 2 hands. You aren’t tempted to step over them, causing you to break a leg as you fall down the stairs. They look cool.

Why spoil your minimalist heaven with clunky gates? why measure and install with screwdrivers? Why open and close a gate every time you need the loo? – just peel the sticky back and place on wall.

They could be as unobtrusive as an air freshener. Actually, they would be less obtrusive because they wouldn’t smell.

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The deluxe model could SMS your mobile when activated if you’re house is so big you can’t head the BANGSWOOOOSH deployment noise.

The deterrent factor could be accommodated by the airbag unit saying ‘No‘ as small people approached the stairs.

The standard model should probably play an alarm – loud enough to draw attention, not so load as to freak out fallen child. Perhaps an alarm AND some nursery rhymes in a soothing voice. Or just a voice saying ‘apple crumble’ repeatedly to distract the trapped small person.

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Also available in stumbly elderly relative size!
They could also be used to catch burglars!
Waterproof models could even be fitted to showers for old people who may slip and smack their head on a tiled floor.

Add some LED lighting to these on a trigger from the motion sensor and you have a safer staircase for everyone in the dark, not just when falling. Cool red lasers could make you feel like sneaking downstairs for a biscuit in the middle of the night was a Mission Impossible.

Some airbag manufacturer has to be able to make money out of making these! The car market must be saturated, even cheap tiny Mazdas have about 9 in them.

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Thanks for the CC image base for the diagram above to http://flickr.com/photos/kikisdad/25543650/

September 1, 2007 | Filed Under

 

Comments

One Response to “stairbags”

  1. Vince on September 2nd, 2007 2:33 am

    Interesting idea. If you have dangerous staircases, this would give the parents out there a much safer feeling.

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